This is a tough decision

By -
I recently found out that my babies heart's stopped beating around week seven. I thought I was 12 weeks pregnant when they did the ultrasound. This was last wednesday and I have been trying to get in for a D&C procedure. We are no longer covered under school insurance, our last day was Sunday. I didn't think that we would be able to afford the procedure, but I didn't think that I had any other options either. We were finally able to talk to a doctor on Monday and I found out that a natural miscarriage was possible also. I haven't been able to decide how long is too long to wait for this to happen naturally and I was wondering if anyone knew pros or cons for either option. I have been so concerned about taking care of this that I haven't even stopped to think about what is happening I just feel so anxious. Any information would be so helpful.
Thanks.

Comments

Katie said…
Oh Erin, I'm so sorry for your loss. I had a miscarriage at 8 weeks back in April, and I was so sad.

My understanding is that you can wait up to 30 days for the miscarriage to happen naturally. Your doctor will probably want you to come in for HcG blood tests at least once a week until your numbers are back down to a very low level.

Personally, I felt best waiting it out until nature took its course, but there are drugs available to speed the process along.

You'll be in my prayers. This is never easy.
August 19, 2009 8:30 PM
Jen L said…
I am SO sorry Erin! I had 3 miscarriages and they are just as hard as can be... especially when you know the baby is no longer living and you are just waiting!

My biggest thing about D&C's is that you go in with the remnants of the little life, get knocked out to some degree, and then it's over. As awful as the pain and time of miscarrying naturally is, I find it is part of a grieving process. It gave me at least 7 days to remember and hurt and grieve. Just make sure, if you do wait, to have the dr.'s follow up on your levels and ensure that they are all the way back to where they are supposed to be.

My biggest question would be, would you really have been 12 weeks? Or was that just your guess? Because if the baby stopped developing at 7 weeks, then 5 weeks is a long time to still be waiting. It's such a personal decision, but if your body really has been waiting 5 weeks, then you may be ready just to move on to the next part and try to move to some normalcy. In that case, a D&C is a good option, but like Katie said, there are ways that the dr. can help speed things up.

Just make sure you do what is best for you! Miscarriages can be devastating! So allow yourself to grieve and don't let yourself be forced into an option that isn't medically necessary!
August 19, 2009 11:16 PM
Stephanie said…
Oh Erin, I am so sorry to hear this. I am reading this five days after you posted it, so you have probably made your decision by now. But I was just going to add that I think they can give you something to induce the miscarriage, so you're not just "waiting" for weeks. Both of my miscarriages were natural. It was hard to have it last for days, but at the same time, I felt good about the fact that it was all happening naturally and without risks. I think either way is okay, just whatever feels right.

Again, so sorry! Miscarriages are an awful thing to experience.
August 24, 2009 10:02 AM
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